Sweet Bebe Sophie

On a sweet November evening of last year, we welcomed our third child, Sophie Grace into our crazy family. Of all the birth stories previously written on this blog (here + here), hers was by far the shortest. We had been praying that labor would short and somewhat sweet. To be honest, I hadn't fully prepared mentally for her birth, like I had for my first child or even second child. Perhaps for that reason, I felt a bit wimpish when labor began to pick up in intensity.

Early labor started on a Friday afternoon, around the same time we were supposed to leave to go on a boat ride (could you imagine if we had gone?) with some of my husband's co-workers. I actually didn't notice when I started getting the contractions, because I was tending to my second one. My in-laws had come over shortly after, as they were going to watch the boys as we were about to leave for the boat ride. Timing-wise, this was perfect, since we had no idea when my labor would start, and the whole thought of having the two kids with me alone while it happened, terrified me a bit. But to have the Hubby home AND my in-laws over to watch the kids was an answered prayer in itself, and looking back, it's funny how much I often worry about things that are totally out of my control, but the Lord knew it would all work out in the end!

After a couple hours of consistent, but painless contractions, we decided to head closer to the hospital to walk around, just in case we encountered another near car-birth experience again. We decided to drive to the mall to walk around, and soon my contractions began to pick up in speed and intensity, spacing at 3-7 minutes apart. I was feeling nervous about the timing of the contractions, so we headed to the hospital. 

It was a rather quiet evening at the hospital this time, with one other patient in L+D. We got situated, and the nurse told me I was only 4cm, which was shocking to me, because some of the contractions started to get uncomfortable. They told us we had 2 hours to walk around the halls before they would check me again, and if I didn't progress, they would send me home. I felt disappointed, but the nurse encouraged me with the fact that labor would speed up quickly after 5cm, since this was my third one. 

We walked up and down the hospital hallway for a little over an hour, and my contractions started to become more painful, and each step becoming more unbearable. The thought of staring at another set of hospital tiles made me queasy, and I began feeling weak, imagining different scenarios, worrying that I would be going through the same pain for hours (and feeling as though my pain tolerance has decreased). Mike prayed for me, asking the Lord to show me grace with a shorter labor this time around. 

I decided to go back to the room to sit down and rest, and that was when my mom called to ask how I was doing. I remember telling her I was about to have a big contraction, and so she hung up the phone (haha). Afterwards, the nurse told us to let her know if I began to feel the urge to push, which happened right after she left the room. The nurse ran back in, and started paging the doctor, who was in the OR with a patient who was having a C-Section. Holding back the urge to push has always been the worst feeling, and I was ready to push the baby out, doctor or no doctor! After what felt like an eternity, the doctor rushed in and told me to push once, pause and push again. And just like that, our screaming sweet little girl (with a big set of lungs) was born!

Holding our baby girl in my arms was just as sweet as the first time I held my boys. Seriously, the feeling of holding and meeting your child for the first time never gets old. I can see why some are willing to go through it over and over...the addiction is real, folks. Even though babies all look the same, there was something daintier and more fragile with a girl-- from her slender little fingers to her soft, pink cheeks, sweet smell and higher pitched cry (a bit shrill at times), I loved every bit of it.

One of my biggest fears with having a third has been the whole jealously issue that our first child experienced when our second one was born. So, so many folks had been praying hard over us and our boys-- that they would love and protect her. And by God's grace (see the common theme here?), the boys have been nothing but sweet to their baby sister, even smothering her a bit too much at times. She is incredibly blessed, and we are even more blessed and thankful to have her in our family.  

Our first set of family photos taken by my awesome brother, Spencer (he took these all under half an hour)!

I cannot tell you how long it took to find a decent Christmas photo with everyone somewhat looking at the camera

Welcoming Baby Lucas

On April 16th, we welcomed in our second baby boy, Lucas David. His arrival was quite a process, very much unlike the typical textbook labor I experienced with my first labor. What felt like "labor," began a few days prior, with Braxton Hicks occurring sporadically starting early Tuesday morning. The following day resulted in similar contractions that grew stronger, but nothing consistent enough to be labeled as active labor. They were starting to become a nuisance, so I decided to try ignoring them and going about my day. 

The third night, I was awoken by contractions that were beginning to feel slightly painful, causing me to sit up and breath through each one. I woke the husband up once again (I was starting to feel like the boy who cried wolf) to tell him I thought today would really be "the day." He got up with me and we watched "Modern Family" (it has become a tradition with each labor) to take my mind off the contractions. By 4am, they were coming every 5-7 minutes and growing stronger. We ate breakfast and decided to go for a walk to speed things along, stopping to breath during each contraction. After walking for some time, I was beginning to feel exhausted from the lack of sleep the previous nights. We sat down on the park bench and the contractions stopped the entire time I rested. We walked back home and by then, I only had one contraction within 20 minutes. I began to feel frustrated, as each of these contractions seemed to lead to false hope of a real labor. I began to desperately pray that I would not be in "labor" for days on end. 

I decided to take a nap to rest and take my mind off of the contractions and had a few strong ones while I was resting. Afterwards, my husband suggested that I soak in the tub to relax, as that seemed to trigger labor the first time around. We lit candles and played some relaxing piano music, the same playlist I labored to in the past at the hospital. Being in the warm water was soothing and actually helped ease some discomfort during the contractions. I could see why some women choose a water birth, I would too if our hospital provided bathtubs! At this point, my contractions came back feeling stronger and lasting longer than the previous ones. I laid in the tub for what was probably two hours before deciding to get out. When I went outside to talk with my mother (she ended up staying with us to take care of JJ after the first day of false labor), I experienced a few more of the same contractions that didn't enable me to speak. She glanced at the clock and saw that they were coming every 5 minutes, so she went to the yard to call my husband to come back inside. Apparently he was jumping in the jumper with our oldest son, thinking it was false labor once again, so he took his time putting the equipment away. By the time he went inside, I had a big contraction and began to feel the urge to push. He took one look at me and knew it was time to head to the hospital. 

We rushed out of the house as fast as we could, and from what I could remember, the ride there resembled one out of a car chase movie. Since it was late in the afternoon, rush hour had already begun. The husband weaved in and out of lanes and "safely" ran a red. The entire time I was focusing on breathing through the strong contractions and keeping my mind off the pain. I tried visualizing a steady stream with trees all around from Psalm 23 and surprisingly this helped. 

When we arrived at the entrance of the hospital, my husband left the car in the passenger drop-off and we made a mad dash for the elevator. I hobbled into the lobby, which was unusually packed with people. I gave the nurse my name and was pleasantly surprised to see my doctor on call! They gave me one of the last rooms available and the walk from the door to the bed felt like an eternity. After I changed into the hospital gown, the nurse made a comment that the bed wasn't a drop-down delivery bed. I suppose they ran out of rooms, but there was no way I was moving at this point- we would have to manage without the convenience. One of the nurses came in to check me and told us I was 9.5 cm, basically ready to push (the involuntary pushing had already begun). She yelled down the hall to call the doctor in, and several more nurses rushed in. The anesthesiologist came by and asked if I wanted an epidural, which was quite humorous considering the fact that I was about to push, and the epidural would be counterproductive. I graciously declined. Afterwards, one of the nurses stabbed my wrist with a needle and blood came spewing out, as she had hit the wrong nerve a couple of times. I recall her telling me to try and put pressure on it, but my focus was elsewhere. They opted out on the IV. 

By this point I was waiting for them to prop me into the right position to push. They moved my body  diagonally, my legs dangling off the side of the bed. The doctor grabbed her tools and they told me I could officially begin pushing. I was laying flat on my back with my knees propped up, possibly the most uncomfortable pushing position. I was tired of waiting and the thought of going through another contraction made me anxious. I pushed through the first contraction and even harder during the next, and it was then that our already mischievous baby boy made his grand appearance late afternoon. It was instant relief as they placed his little body on my chest to hold for the very first time, something I didn't have the chance to experience with my first due to minor complications. I was in awe, shock and numbness all at once. Unlike what you typically see on the tube, I never felt the mushy-gushy weepy feelings upon seeing my children for the first time. The feelings usually settle in slowly over the weeks, months even. Every experience is unique for each Mama, but still miraculous to witness nonetheless. Giving birth is one of the most challenging experiences (first of many!) a Mama will go through, but the light at the end of the tunnel (literally) bears tremendous blessings.

Its been nearly a month since little Lucas was born, and time has gone by slowly, yet quickly. Being a second-time mama does have its benefits, as you tend to recover sooner and have less anxiety about the things you worried about the first time around. However...the transition going from 1 to 2 can be brutal. We were told that it not only becomes double the work, but it is also exponentially more difficult. And that statement remains true thus far, as we have all been learning to adjust to our new addition (more on that later). 

Challenges aside, it has been rather nice to have this sweet addition to our little family. Seeing the way his older brother interacts with him is heartwarming, though brief (it doesn't take long for his gentle caresses to turn into pinching and squeezing). Being a second sibling does have its advantages though (and cabin fever hit us harder this time around)- this little guy has already seen the likes of Disneyland (don't tell the grandparents!), yummy eateries, a drive-in movie and Target/Costco runs all within the early weeks of his life here in this big bad world...and there are more to come! We feel extremely blessed (and terrified) to be entrusted with yet another one of these precious little ones. 

Some recent photos of our growing family... 

"Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord,

The fruit of the womb is a reward.

Like arrows in the hand of a warrior,

So are the children of one’s youth.

Happy is the man who has his quiver full of them;

They shall not be ashamed,

But shall speak with their enemies in the gate."

- Psalm 127:3-5

Proud older brother

First drive-in movie with the entire fam!

This is how we do family nap-time

Wonder who was responsible for this?

 Can never get enough of that newborn smile (even if it's involuntary, can we just pretend it isn't?)

JJ found himself a "baby" to take care of too : )

Never wake up a sleeping baby...

I leave you with this endearing quote... { Handwritten by TheGildedPage }

A Delayed Christmas Gift

I know I've been awfully behind on blog posts, but I figured I should get the "surprise" out there on the blog! I am currently close to being 7 months pregnant, and time is going by faster than ever. I don't recall the first pregnancy going by this quickly, but I suppose it is only natural because I have another child to take care of this time around. I do however, feel less anxious and much more relaxed with this pregnancy (maybe a little too relaxed at times). The downside is the fact that we have not yet decided upon a name!

Little J seems to be somewhat excited when we mention that he will now become a big brother. He started off by being particularly needy with me after we told him the fact, and then there was a time when he would want to rub belly balm on my growing belly and smother the bump with hugs and kisses. He has also developed a huge interest in other babies, and began babying his stuffed animals. Lately, he has been saying that his "little brother" will be playing cars with him (I assured him that would all happen in due time), so I think he's starting to get it. I know that Little J will be a wonderful older brother!

The thought of handling two children is a bit daunting, but I am trying to enjoy this time of having one as best as I can until that day arrives. I hear the challenge is not just double the trouble, but that it becomes exponentially more challenging. Either way, we are very excited for this new addition to our little family and will attempt to take it one moment at a time.

A Maternity Photo Session in the Gardens

This past summer, I had the opportunity to photograph the gorgeous mama, Lucy Han and her lovely family at the Huntington Library & Gardens in San Marino, California. She recently gave birth to another beautiful baby boy and keeps busy with her own business, Beauty by Lucy Han. Her make-up, hair and eyelash extension skills are amazing, and I can attest to that! She has a great, big heart and somehow manages to also work full-time as a social worker. How does she do it? I'd like to ask her the same question. Lucy and her family made it easy for me to photograph them, and her darling little boy is going be a heartbreaker one day...!

Recently, I've been getting back into doing photo sessions and rediscovering why I enjoy it so much. After having my own family, the chance to photograph other families through capturing special moments and expressions has come with new meaning. I am thankful for the people who have entrusted me with that opportunity and have encouraged me to continue with my photography, especially during the times I second guess myself. We usually are our own worst critiques when we allow fear and self-doubt to cloud our judgement-- and that is the beauty of having optimistic people in our lives that can see beyond our own near-sightedness. Nevertheless, there is always room for growth and opportunities to learn throughout.

Ahoy mateys!

We threw a Sailor-themed 1st belated birthday party for the little guy, with a group of people who have played a special part in the early months of his life. How strange it is to think that over a couple years ago, he never existed in our lives. It almost feels as though he has been a part of our little family this whole entire time. Life felt tremendously different before him-- I was different, our lives were different. It's incredible to see how much a little person can change the way you live and view life in general.

Much of the decor used for his party were things I found lying around the house. I tried to be resourceful by tweaking old decorations in order to fit the theme. Simplicity seems to be of the theme of my life these days. Pinterest also sparked some ideas such as hanging baby's onesies on a clothing line to use as a banner across the room. My version involved hanging some of his sailor-inspired outfits from birth-now. The rest involved construction paper and good ole Elmer's glue!

Bebe J was such a trooper and partied until his eyes grew heavy as it was way past his bedtime. I'm sure he didn't know this was exactly a party for him, as he was overwhelmed with all the extra attention (which did involve a "minor" meltdown). I guess first birthday parties are more for the memories down the road, and we made sure to take a ton of photos for him to "remember," so that he can thank us later ; )